Ryan Wrecker: I’m Getting Old

At 34 years old, I’ve reached the point in my life when I know I’m getting old.  You know how I know I’m getting old?

  • I listen to commercials with doctors in them
  • Take a 20 minute walk around the block is enough to make me sore the next day
  • When a storm is coming, I rub my knee because I can feel it in my bones
  • I rant about politics
  • There’s always a layer of dust on the lenses of my glasses
  • Stopped caring about looks years ago
  • Close to trading in my smart phone for a flip phone
  • Cracklin’ Oat Bran is my favorite cereal
  • I’ll get pancakes at McDonalds
  • Sometimes I’ll even wash or re-use ZipLock bags
  • I give out Werther’s Original to kids on Holloween
  • I wake up to go to the bathroom at least once at night
  • I keep a watchful eye out the window so kids getting off the bus leave my front yard away
  • When growing up, I never had a snow day off of school
  • I remember when Trix Cereal resembled actual shapes of fruit
  • Y2k was an actual concern of my childhood
  • When I played video games, you didn’t need to download anything
  • TV entertainment was only a clown throwing a ping-pong ball in a cup
  • Every time I stand up, something ‘pops’
  • “I need to take a moment” is a common phrase
  • There’s Ovaltine in my cabinet
  • I know the taste of powdered milk
  • Most of my hearing is gone
  • Thinking of getting an Alpaca
  • The Coke I drink is in a brown can – you know the stuff that has nothing good in it
  • I’m coming up to renew my AARP membership
  • Still think 1997 was just 10 years ago
  • My cuts don’t heal as fast, if at all
  • I won’t pay more than $14 for a piece of clothing
  • Every video game is called Nintendo, and it’s better that way
  • There’s 100% chance I fall asleep on the couch
  • I buy brand name batteries
  • I notice other peoples lawns for good or bad
  • I keep getting letters in the mail for TV guide
  • All glasses need to have a chain attached to them so I don’t lose them

If I could see 10 years in the future, I can only imagine it will get a lot worse.

If you want to connect with the show, message me on Twitter @RyanWrecker  OR e-mail  ryan.wrecker@kmox.com

Now some Tweets…

 

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I don’t feel young, and if anything about modern day society is true… my feelings dictate reality!

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Jarome has some serious sketching sklls

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Glad to know I’m not the only one who finds these all over the house

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Surprised 4% of people are either liars or have never heard the word before today.

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That is the official Wayne’s World couch!

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